Defining computer terms from a “Marketing” point of view

ALL NEW – The software is not compatible with previous versions.
ADVANCED DESIGN – Upper management doesn’t understand it.
BREAKTHROUGH – It nearly booted on the first try.
NEW – It comes in different colors from the previous version.
DESIGN SIMPLICITY – It was developed on a shoe-string budget.
EXCLUSIVE – We’re the only ones who have the documentation.
FIELD TESTED – Manufacturing doesn’t have a test system.
FOOLPROOF OPERATION – All parameters are hard coded.
FUTURISTIC – It only runs on the next-generation supercomputer.
HIGH ACCURACY – All the directories compare.
IT’S HERE AT LAST – We’ve released a 26-week project in 48 weeks.
MAINTENANCE FREE – It’s impossible to fix.
MEETS QUALITY STANDARDS – It compiles without errors.
PERFORMANCE PROVEN – It works through beta test.
REVOLUTIONARY – The disk drives go round and round.
SATISFACTION GUARANTEED – We’ll send you another copy if it fails.
STOCK ITEM – We shipped it once before, and we can do it again, probably.
UNMATCHED – It’s almost as good as the competition.
UNPRECEDENTED PERFORMANCE – Nothing ever ran this slow before.
YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT – We finally got one to work.